The dictators are probably better people than any of us in basically any respect. More intelligent, more likable, more moral, better looking etc. After all they've managed to win so many people to their side.

However, they are afraid. There's a limit where you suppress the people and opposition one time too much and reach the point of no return where you can't let it slip anymore lest you find yourself shot in the gutter. After that you have no choice but suppress even more or die.

As you see, this has a lot to do with Erkka's horse training. When the horse realizes the big ape doesn't seem to be threatened by its existence but only wants to do weird stuff with it, it has less reason to be afraid itself. The horse might think an ordinary horseman as a psychopath, albeit mostly a benevolent one, while the horseman only tries to get along with a potentially dangerous big animal. Its the same with dictators.