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2nd of May 2014


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Why you live alone? Because people are bad(most people)? You can live without them and be happy with animals? I want it too.. people are bad and social life is going to die. Good old 90'S.. And boys are gays.. Was you in military service?

P.S: Lambs are cute but that on the left is the cutest .

Nah... after barely surviving years of domestic violence, I was an ultra pacifist. I had some sort of feeling what killing is about, and how does it feel - and for the hell of it I knew that reasonable adults should never start a war. And on top of that, I was somewhat emotionally unstable and suicidal. So, the military personnel gave me first a year, then another, and then four years to sort my emotional problems. Which was not enough, after all that time the doctor was still severly worried about the possible ill effects of handing firearms and explosives to me... So finally they just gave me a card which basically says that I'm freed of service in the times of peace.

And I don't feel like living alone, in the sense that I keep a lot of contact with my friends and neighbours. But to me it seems that people often worry about me being alone, wondering if I suffer from loneliness for living without a woman. "You are such a good man, why is it that you haven't found a woman to live with?" they ask - and I'm tired of trying to reply, as I guess they won't understand anyway =) But to put it short - at the moment I feel that living alone is the best thing to do for me. The question is not to find a good woman - the question is to become a good man worth living with. Since I moved away from my parents, most of the time I've been living in a relationship - until I finally understood that what I need is solitude. When I bought my current home, for the first time in my life (at the age of 35) I felt that I have a home where really feel that I can be myself and the live the life the way I like it. Just like the house is in barely livable condition and needs a lot of renovating, so is my personality =) So, I will take all the time it takes to get the house (and my personality) repaired to a better shape...

Imagine having a leaking boat, and people all the time asking "why don't you sail to pretty places out there, it would be such a great fun?" - and the answer would be: "I don't doubt that. I'm just worried that with a leaky boat I might sink before getting anywhere. So the first priority is to get the boat fixed."

And now for something completely different: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xU81PwNf7w - Clementine rocks, the video is funny and music is good =)

I'm crying because nostalgia.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1glM0LgjCOY :'( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aym2uzc2u4Q
Kids were kids, music was music, people was way nicest, no crysis, computers started..

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