Don't worry. Things are hard to communicate. The main weakness of so called private thinking is clinging to words and metaphors used. Think of Kari Peitsamo's theology of having no head. Or that philosophy student in Tampere who found the answers to all philosophical problems from Leibniz's Monadology.

Something we say or think resonates with our personal memories, tendencies, and lifestyle, and we have problem understanding why the others cannot grasp our great explanation. The reason why academic philosophy feels a bit dull is that it tries to communicate this stuff regardless of how hard and boring doing it and the results obtained are.

On the other hand this is why it is often futile to even try to explain our personal choices to the others. We might understand them ourselves but these thoughts are usually thought and used only once and communicated internally to ourselves, so why explicate it to the others. Especially when this explication almost invariably fails.